Thursday, January 31, 2013

Dreams of scorpion stings

A couple of days ago I had a nightmare,
In this nightmare I watched three people jump in front of a train.
Than the ground crumbled below me and some scorpions began to sting me.
Than a friend pulled me from the earth and next thing I knew 
I was in a biet knesset  being asked about someone I went to school with.

What does it mean, I  don't know.

but it was some scary shit, and now I got people beefing with me at work.
Why I can't really decide either way fuck them If I didn't do anything to you and you hate me
that's on you.

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Fuck pork

I don't eat pig if i don't have too
I ordered a pastrami burrito for lunch.
I got a burrito with some sorta fucking white meat.

Why don't I eat pork?, well to honor my family.
What would happen if i don't eat lunch
I act like a bitch and I get in trouble.
weather this was a joke or a simple mistake, it don't 
seem right it don't feel right
bu hey i guess I'll get over it soon.
I'm just gonna go vomit

Well until next time paca. 

Sunday, January 27, 2013

Hand writing analysis

Well I finally got it done.
I went and got a hand writing analysis. according to the doctor 
I'm very lonely very damaged, I have a hard time dealing with other people...
as far as trust and stress goes.

Apparently I'm allergic to sugar basically I need to go vegetarian, with fish.
I also need to sleep more otherwise I get crazy. 
According to the doc I'm very intelligent and very talented.
According to the doc I have allot of depth.
I need to be around nature as well. 

He said I could be a writer or a landscape architect.
though apparently I dress like a slob, and I give off negative vibes.

Well back in good old Paso Robles"land of rolling hills dotted with majestic oaks, and 
phenomenal vineyards, the way I talk and dress is normal back there i'm just one of the simple hill folk.
Rather I'm like any other thug-billy.
In Paso people take what I give they don't expect me to change into a different person.
They love and respect who I am.

This is one of the billion times a Jewish person has told me I have shmuttz on my soul.
This is the billionth time the way I talk, like a cowboy or a nigger isn't so 
pa shut for all the irvings"stereotypical jews" out there.
Apparently it's just not mensch like.

well Yiddish was never thought of as mensch like 
and wearing cloths styled after what they wore in eastern Europe 
100 years ago is far from mensch like.
That's one.

For a people that believe in a collective soul
which was scattered across the globe,
you would figure they would be more excepting of their brothers, 
But alas look at me I refuse to assimilate 
their will be no Borg take over, 
there will be no losing myself,
only bettering myself. 

So I will dress better when the money comes 
and I will diet and sleep and exercise.
But the jet fighting cowgirl will never die 
because that's who I am that's what G-d made

Thursday, January 24, 2013

pilonidal purgatory

Pilonidal cyst's aren't fun.
It's a genetic condition a cyst on the tailbone brought on because of ingrown hairs.
If it gets inflamed it puts a bunch of pressure on the cleft of your butt.
Eventually it bursts and you get a smelly mixture of blood and pus
leaking out of your body.  

The last time I had it I didn't know what it was. I 
laid in my cousins house bleeding all over my clothes and crying.
well damn it here it is again. and here I am again, though this time the doctors gave me some nice hydrocodone to keep me high,though not dry.
If your lucky you might get to catch me moaning in pain.

My only question is why me. Why does this happen to me.
The only benefit besides the drugs is now i have an excuse for the bottle of nair 
in my room.

well until next time paca

Friday, January 18, 2013

Damn everyone is trippin

Ok my Mom and my brother are mad at me.
I chalk it up to me being insensitive, and a lack of communication.
I feel bad for pissing them off. 

Today I was on my way to lunch, when some guy walked on our green light.
So when we passed his crazy ass"he was wearing a jacket in this weather"
I asked him"Irish accent" what the fuck are ya doing"
he turned around and screamed a very emotional fuck you.
Well fuck him I don't give a good G-d damn about his feelings that sum of a bitch
went and stole two minutes from my life. 

This made me realize though I don't have to be lil miss sweat hart all the time.
I realized SOMETIMES it's OK to be a bitch.
So if you go and start messing with me and my peace, and I hurt your feelings just
remember you provoked one of those times. 

and to all my crazy friends, you need to be aware of other people.
I don't care if you wear a jacket and it's hot outside that's fine
just don't go being a selfish dick and expect everyone to be OK with it.

until next time paca

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

I need more wine"wine tasting with Emillie Vanya in drab"

OK So there i was at the Solomon Society.
The Solomon society is an up and coming Jewish fraternity.
You might know the scene a bunch of men getting away from their wives.
Shmoozing and boozing and cutting themselves back room deals.

Enter Emillie Vanya, well i'm just a sweet transthingy 
stuck in drab" I can't stop feeling like a woman I don't know why, i guess it's because sometimes G-d can have a cruel sense of humor".

Well I'm there tasting wine and working the crowd.
Unfortunately  I don't have such a good name, maybe it's because i'm not religious. 
Maybe it's because I don't watch football every weekend. 
Maybe it's because.....who cares I got bad vibes, but I also got good info.
Like a two year plan for aviation mechanics, and than a national guard
membership for more school and free medical. 
Well now i'm back home drinking my coconut water to, 
re hydrate and kill the hang over.
Scouts motto always be prepared.

Oh and of course the wine 
tonight's gem
Mauritson 2008 cabernet sauvignon, Sonoma County
honestly the wine had an edge of a forest, when I say edge 
I mean "the hints"
Imagine a nice ride through a road through a forest at night.
well that's what my tongue felt 
So if you ever wanna ride me bring a bottle of this and 
we can do whatever you wan't kroshka.

For my Kosher people
You have not been forgotten 
Goose Bay Pinot Noir 
This was light and sweet in a dry way you know fruity notes
This wine gave me the feeling of 
spring in Tel Aviv
for those of you that don't know Tel Aviv is my happy place.

well until next time paca

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

My observations of Dexter

The other day I was kicking it with my Dad. "I told my Grandma his mom about my little secret"
We where watching Dexter. 

Now I would like to take a minute to look at Dexter.
He's a guy with a dark secret, he has a habit that is by no means conventional. 
When Dexter doesn't Murder someone he gets stressed pressure builds up.
Dexter's addiction or habit can be likened to anything.

So in this episode Dexters sister figures out he's a serial killer, 
now here comes the stupid question 
"Are you a serial killer?"

OK now lets look at this sentence are you a......?
So my dad asks me how does she know he's a serial killer?
Well I say I don't know but it's a pretty powerful question.
Are you a tagger?
Are you a Blogger? are you a Cross dresser?

So there it is I wonder what he thought about that?